An Ode To The Hot Professor

There is nothing better than encountering somebody who is both facey and intelligent. It is like Miley Cyrus said back when she was just an adorable little Disney star: you get the best of both worlds.

Lectures can be boring as hell, reading case studies can make you want to drop out of college all together and do not even get me started on studying for midterms. It is easy for a college student to lose some motivation and gain some frustration during their undergrad years. How have universities combatted these negative feelings?

By recruiting hot professors and graduate students to teach their classes. Sure, the university probably hired them for their stellar credentials, but there had to be a moment during the hiring process where the recruiters noticed how hot they were on their LinkedIn page and thought, “Wow, I’m sure the ladies will show up to his class.”

There is not greater feeling than walking into a class on syllabus week (if you even decide to go to class, that is) and seeing a guy at the front of the class who pulls off the thick-rimmed glasses look better than Clark Kent. I think I speak on behalf of many college students when I say hot professors can be the best and the worst thing that has every happened to us in our educational careers.

If you are like me and you get nervous around unbelievably pretty people, making a hot professor a tad intimidating to some people, leading them to vocalize less in class. If you are also like me, you tend to say f*** it to all your inhibitions, which makes sense because I’m pretty sure I will always have enough alcohol in my blood flow to give me some liquid courage. That being said, this IDGAF mentality will encourage you to make yourself as noticeable as possible. So really, a hot teacher can inspire you to do more work for the specific class. This is why I always try to choose my professors for my tougher courses based on a balance between teaching skills and attractiveness level (thank God for ratemyprofessor.com, or else this would be much harder to do while scheduling courses.)

So in order to let Professor Marry-Me understand how worthy of his time and affection you are, you make sure you do all the class reading so that you can participate. Clearly, your prof enjoys imaginative and analytical minds, so showing him your knowledge will increase your chances of having a “study session” with him in the future.

Another beautiful thing about college is that you are (probably) legal! Sure, relationships with teachers may be frowned upon by some members of society, but so is Tequila Tuesday, and we still partake in that with a smile on our faces and salt and limes in our hands. So unlike when you felt shame about thinking your middle school gym teacher was kind of cute, now you can be totally and unapologetically interested in your prof. They may even be close to your age, so the false hope that comes with all of these factors makes your crush rather exciting, but also devastating since your teacher probably has adopted and developed more values than you have.

So this is an ode to all of the hot professors that inspire us to do better in their class while also inspiring our ideas of what we want as #RelationshipGoals. A professor is a job that requires intelligence, deep thought, accountability and an ability to engage through communication. Are those not all the traits we want in our future spouses or what?

Thank you, hot professors, for reminding us that it is possible to be both smart and attractive. Thank you for showing up to class in business casual, because your collared shirt makes you look seductive while you provoke thoughts in our discussion period. While this may seem superficial, really this ode is also supporting the stellar components of the education system. We, as college students, need to be inspired during our undergrads to expand our minds, and sometimes said inspiration comes from a TA’s perfectly chiseled jaw.

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