5 Types of College Guys that Suck

Girls, don’t date these guys. Guys, try not to be these kind of people. Here are 5 types of college guys that are the absolute worst.

1) The Amateur Bodybuilder

Don’t let his possibly less-than-impressive stature fool you. This guy is for real. After spending hundreds of dollars on a subscription to Men’s Fitness, a 10 pound tub of protein and dozens of random supplements, this guy is on pace to “get incredibly swole.”

giphy (2)

Can be found: dropping his 15 pound dumbbells in the gym every other week.

2) The Van Wilder

This guy has very clearly outstayed his welcome. He has the combined experience of three college students and has every freshman bar bouncer know his name. Working on his degree has taken backseat to extending the life for as long as possible.


Can be found: playing pong by himself at 11:30 in the morning.

3) The Know-it-All

This one doesn’t actually need to come to class. He’s so far ahead of the textbook he could probably qualify to teach the class himself. But instead of helping his peers that may be struggling he sits waiting to correct the professor or offer a better answer than whatever someone suggested.


Can be found: in the back of the room, waiting for his time to shine.

4) The Mooch

It’s a legitimate mystery whether or not this guy even pays to go to school. Whenever it comes time to split the check or handle the gas you can hear the words “I’ll get you back later,” almost every time. Whenever he does get money it’s likely to have been borrowed from someone in order to pay someone else and then a miniature Ponzi scheme erupts.

giphy (3)

Can be found: “getting you back later.”

5) The Conversationalist

Under some circumstances, this guy is actually really great. But he always seems to catch you once you’re on your way to class or running late or trying to sleep. There’s always a point where a conversation dies but he won’t let that happen; it is his sole mission to keep speaking for as long as humanly possible.

giphy (1)

Can be found: talking to the professor long after class ends.

A jack-of-all-trades that’s trying to master one.
Physics major at the University of Albany.

You Might Also Like