A Letter To The Boyfriend Who Cheated (2)

After all this, you told me you wish you didn’t settle and, yes, I saw your Facebook status: “NEVER settle. A true man is never really content,” you said. If that doesn’t make a girl feel like ultimate crap, I don’t know what does I just laugh out loud when I read the text messages my friends and I receive from your friends, telling us how much you still love and care for me. You wanted attention, and you’re trying to put all of the blame on me when, in reality, none of this is my fault. Why do I constantly feel like it is, almost as if i’m the one who cheated, or hurt you? I never betrayed you; this blame doesn’t belong on me, and it sucks that I feel this way. Yes, I admit to hurting you emotionally before, but I gave you everything, did everything for you, and was always loyal. Yes, I did change along the way, but who doesn’t?

Riddle me this: why would I want to hear from a guy I once loved. who is supposedly still in love with me, and wants to talk, but is already hitting up people I know and hanging out with other girls? Don’t get mad at me if girls are afraid of you, if they keep their guard up, or question your intentions. You reached out to me again: I just found it today, a week later, which is what possessed me to write this letter. The truth is, I’m not telling people how bad of a person you are, and I certainly do not have issues. You made that reputation up for yourself; people know you. Honestly, I do tell people you cheated on me because those are the facts. You created this “bad idea” of yourself for everyone around to see. People talk, people spread rumors, people have experienced being with you, and people know how you act. So why am I constantly feeling like I am this terrible person?

This article wasn’t for attention, or to scare your next girlfriend away. Honestly, she’s probably a great girl if she can keep you in check. I wish the best for both of you. This was nothing more than an outlet for me to release my true feelings. Here I am, one month later, and ready to move on. I haven’t been on one date, I get to go out with my friends almost every weekend, I’m focusing on myself, I’m doing well in school, I’m living life, and, most importantly, I don’t have anyone lowering my self-esteem. You’re right: I’m fine, and I know that you are too. I might have to keep my guard up now, I definitely don’t play mind games, I might come off too aggressive because I need straight answers, and I don’t want to be toyed with anymore. In all seriousness, I thank you for shaping me into this tiny, tough woman I am now (because i’m tougher than I used to be.) I now know how to stick up for myself in any type of situation life throws at me. I know how I want and deserve to be treated by the next guy, and if it scares the guy off then, well, he’s just not ready for the chase.

Love,
Me

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