When your Bestfriend is an Introvert (as an Extrovert)

Firstly, I’d like to make a disclaimer: I am in no way insinuating that this is true for everyone. I am just basing this off of my own experiences and from asking some of my peers and friends. So if some – or all – of this doesn’t apply to you, I’m not questioning your friendships. (Also, the person mentioned in this article has given me permission to use his name and photograph.)


My best friend at college is named Sam – and he is very much an introvert. That’s not to say that he doesn’t have a social life; in fact, every Tuesday after the class we have together, we have laundry and homework time. But come to think of it, I guess that’s not the best example of being “social.”



A fairly low quality picture of us.


There are definitely both upsides and downsides to having an introverted best friend as an extrovert Below I’m going to talk about some of both.


Let’s start with the positive:

1. You’ll always have someone to watch Netflix with you

2. They get if you need time to yourself/time alone.

Many people assume that, extroverts are always social. And while some very well may be that way, most of us do need a little bit of “me time.”

3. They see things from a different point of view, allowing you to get another opinion.

4. They’re (generally) really good listeners


5. And with that, they (again, generally) tend to give logical advice.

6. They’re the people you want to go to if you want to have a deep/serious conversation.

A lot of introverts are the “think before you speak” type. But, like me, quite a few of us extroverts lack the natural “thinky-thinky” gene. That’s why having a discussion of gravity with your introverted best friend is beneficial. Two extroverts would end up in a heated argument and result to yelling over one another. But I’ve noticed that, when I talk to Sam, I find myself thinking about what I am going to say before I actually say it.


Now it’s time for the not-so-positive aspects:

1. They normally don’t enjoy going out drinking or partying.


The original awkward turtle. 

2. The times that they need to be alone to recharge and you need to socialize.

3. When they’re uncomfortable or shy around your other friends/new people.

4. They don’t always get why a social event is such a big deal to you

5. They don’t understand why you’re being such a “drama queen” about something that really isn’t worth the energy in the long run.

And while you may have your differences, they’re still your best friend. And if you’re an introvert with an extroverted best friend, please know that we’re trying. And that we love our best friends.

Here’s a question:

Are you and your best friend alike or total opposites?

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