We all at some point have had relationships in college. Some of us had one or two others have had more. The lucky few end up finding “the one” in college and never have to worry about it again. We all know how awkward it can be dealing with the issues associated with finding someone new and starting a relationship or ending an old relationship and getting over that person. Here are five things to know about “College Relationships”:
1. Marrying your College Sweetheart
The chances of meeting your soulmate and being college sweethearts turned happy couple are slim (to none for some). Let’s face it. Most college students go through relationship after relationship while some have never even had one. To think the person you end up with could be the one you marry is a bit naive but it can happen. Some people expect it to happen when they go to college. The truth is that the only way to find out is to try it and see if it works out which brings us to the next thing on our list.
2. Finding a partner
It’s hard to find a partner in the first place. Depending on the size of your campus finding the right person is like finding a needle in a hay stack. Even with a magnifying glass it can be next to impossible. You’ll probably end up going through tons of people before you even end up finding someone you want to be with. By the time you’ve found someone you’ve probably already friend-zoned a large number of people. So now you have at least two lists of people. People who are just friends and people who are potential relationship candidates. When looking for a partner start with people you know such as friends or people who have similar interests so that you can find common ground. People who have things in common find it easier to get along and build a bond. Friendship is one of the first relationships we have outside of family so it becomes the basis for other types of relationships. This may be more difficult at a large university than it would be at a small community college. Adding online classes would make it even more difficult to interact with people on a daily basis.
3. Dealing with a Break Up
Now this is the part that we all hate the most. The part where one or both parties are all sad and lonely. Usually someone gets off better than the other who of course ends up worse off. Getting the short end of the stick happens to people often. Maybe you and your high school sweet heart didn’t work out after the transition or you met someone in college and it didn’t work out. Feeling depressed is normal but shouldn’t stop you from living your life. The next step is to pick yourself up and do something about it. Hang out with your friends and just do things you enjoy doing. Stop thinking about the person and you’ll move on in no time. Now you have at least three lists of people, friends, potential candidates and exes. Start to look at potential candidates once again after you have moved on and gotten over your past relationship and partner.
4. Flings and Hook Ups
A lot of times in college people don’t intended to get involved with someone and then they end up in this momentary predicament. Usually short term relationships that can start and end relatively quickly even lasting as little as a few hours. It all starts when two people meet at a club or a party and they get together afterwards to talk, get something to eat/drink or have sex depending on what their mindset is. Often times it could be somebody you met during the summer when you went back home or you met them in class or at school while taking a few classes over the summer. Typically these don’t last or turn into anything serious although they could if situations and circumstances permit. The participants don’t usually allow it to go on longer than necessary and sometimes it can be jointly agreed upon or at the sole discretion of one person involved. Many times these are unexpected and just happen in the spur of the moment when emotions and passions are high, someone is horny and/or drunk, high or not thinking straight. Other times it happens the way all relationships happen normally or in the case of one night stands they happen somehow and nobody knows how or why. A case of the who, what, when, where, why and how syndrome. The best thing to do is not make it awkward and move on from it. Decide what is to happen next if it has already happened or set boundaries and expectations before it does and possibly discuss it with your partner if you can. These usually are the friends with benefits or some other similar no strings attached relationship or at least end up that way. They are spur of the moment bursts of flaming passion that can burn out pretty quickly or get too hot and need to be extinguished. Now you have at least four lists, friends, exes, potential candidates and hookups/flings
5. Remembering Time for Yourself
Remember you’ll be in college anywhere from 1 to 8 years depending on how long you take to finish, what you’re studying and how high the qualifications you are seeking are. You have plenty of time for a relationship so take some time to focus on you. Don’t rush things. Take up recreational and extracurricular activities like sports, join clubs, go to the gym. Don’t forget to make friends and spend time with them, focus on yours classes and your studies. Also remember to put aside time for yourself just to be alone, be you and do the things you like to do. There is no rush to find someone. They will either find you or you will find them in time. When the time is right and you’ve found somebody you can start to build a foundation with you’ll know. Don’t be pushy or in a hurry cause then you could end up with the wrong person or in the wrong relationship and end up unhappy. Pace yourself and take some time to make sure you know and understand what you want in life, in a relationship and in a partner.
College and university relationships are just the beginning of what we’ll face as we enter the world. This is just the tip of the iceberg and there will be many more obstacles to face. College is not just about the things you learn in the classroom because it teaches you many life lessons. Relationships are only a small part but the experience you gain from those will stick with you and help you throughout your journey called life.
Copyright © 2014 University Primetime | Site by Kevin Ross
