You know those whirlwind romances that we all think will lead us somewhere great? They are the ones that lie on the borderline of friendship and commitment. They are the ones that you cannot label because you are somewhere in between something and nothing. They play with your emotions, and maybe end up working out in the end. Notice the word “maybe” in the previous sentence. We are not Chuck and Blair, and overwhelming passion for one another will not smolder the questions. Unfortunately for hopeless romantics, it helps to remember Chuck and Blair are scripted.
The whirlwind romances are fun for some time, but once that time runs out, they only cause pain and confusion. Despite the pain and the confusion, we always think that it will work out in the end. I mean, if we did not, we would not be fighting for someone who is not necessarily ours. We sit around waiting for a text message that we know in the back of our minds will never come. We get ready to go out to the bar, hoping that tonight will be the night he realizes how much he wants you. Quite honestly, for a while, it is exciting and different. However, it is not what anyone deserves.
How can anything last if even the very beginning of the potential relationship is one big question mark? Really, how can anyone learn to trust someone who cannot muster up the confidence to show their heart?
What I have come to realize is falling in love is easier than we think.
Looking back at who I was last year, I can confidently say I never in a million years thought that those words would be flowing off the end of my tongue. Why? Because I thought love was the hardest damn thing in the world. I thought it was so difficult for many reasons, but mostly because I was caught up in the idea that love means fighting for someone. And, I guess I was not completely wrong. A huge part of love is fighting for someone, yet true love is the other person fighting, too. Love is fighting for someone who cares equally as much as I do.
I found someone, and we just clicked right away. There was never a question as to whether he cared about me or I cared about him. Honestly, it just sort of happened and I think that is the way it should be. He never gave me a reason to not trust him before we started dating, and that makes it easier now that we are dating.
Those whirlwind romances come when two people try to force something that is not there. That is why it hurts. That is why it is confusing. In the midst of trying to figure out the other person, you are also trying to sort out your own feelings.
I am a self-proclaimed relationship expert, but really, I am just as lost as the next person. However, what I do know is that falling in love is easy when it is with the right person. It is finding that person that is the struggle, hence why we force it sometimes. Unfortunately, when it comes to love, us control freaks need to take a step down and let the universe take the reigns. It is about time and place. I was lucky enough to find someone, so I can honestly tell you: when it is real, you will know.
