The 5 Presidential Candidates You Will Party With In College (2)

2.) Hillary Clinton

The Hillary might be the person to have at your shindig. This gal is all about equality, and if you don’t believe me…..wait a minute, this sounds exactly like the Bernie! Now that I think about it, it is almost as if the Hillary just copies everything the Bernie says because people are starting to like him and she is used to being popular. Last week a Bernie brought two bottles of Skyy to a party and people seemed to love it, so the next week the Hillary brought two bottles of Skyy and every one absolutely lost it. “Hillary is the greatest! She is so progressive! Who is Bernie?” The University paper even did a story on it! Yeesh.

1.) Donald Trump

The Trump is known for being the asshole at any get together, not just parties per say, but any get together. I saw one at a party a few weeks ago making fun of a mentally handicapped student on campus, and what is worse, he now wants that guy to apologize to him! One good thing about the Trump is that they have a lot of money, and always buy booze for the party. Not the whole party though, just the white, male, middle to upper class, non handicapped students at the party….okay maybe his money isn’t so great after all. Oh well, I heard him say last week that he kept a bunch of rapists and murderers from crashing my party…I mean I have got to give it to the guy, that is pretty cool. Wait, what? He was just talking about kicking a group of people out for being Mexican? Unacceptable! I can’t try to defend him anymore, the Trump is the douche bag at the party, end of story.

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