1. Why is it so dark? Oh, I didn’t open my eyelids yet.
2. Someone close the curtains it’s too bright!!!!
3. Literally cannot feel any part of my body
4. Where did my shirt go?
5. Can I die from puking? Lemme WebMD this.
6. Everything hurts and I’m going to die in this bed right here.
7. Where is my phone?!
8. Who the hell is texting me?
9. Oh I remember this person, they were hot *stalks Facebook* ok maybe not THAT hot….
10. I wonder if I can roll myself to the bathroom
12. Don’t fall asleep in the shower….or pass out
13. I want ALL the pizza
14. Why do people talk? Like at all? Please be quiet.
15. *orders half of the starbucks menu and drinks it all*
16. I hate my life
17. I hate alcohol and parties, I’m never drinking again
18. LET’S GO OUT THIS WEEKEND WOOHOO!
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