I’ve always tried living my life with “no regrets,” and I’ve been pretty successful in doing so, but there’s always room for improvement with how I choose to conduct myself and my life’s path. Too often, at the end of each year, we focus on all of the things that went wrong- a failed class, a failed relationship, a failed achievement of some goal- and our focus strays away from all of the achievements we did accomplish for that year. That’s not a bad thing until you start self-destructing because you feel as though you’ve wasted yet another year on failure. Every year gone is a new year full of opportunities to fix what you feel has broken you. So, with that said, cheers to 2016 and cheers to the opportunities to improve!
Drop the people in your life who drag you down more times than they lift you up. There’s nothing more exhausting than putting your all into people who don’t appreciate your worth. Spend your time with people who recognize and respect your beauty, your passions, your ambitions, and your time.
You will never find your life’s purpose by spending your days in bed or on the couch. Get up and go see the world. Experience life, make memories, and stop sulking around because life won’t ever get better unless you allow it to. Your couch is good for a rainy afternoon and a good book, but there’s a point where you have to get up, get dressed, and live your life.
Stop glorifying pain. Pain isn’t beautiful. Grief isn’t something you can paint a pretty picture of in someone’s mind. Being hurt is one of the most raw feelings you can feel, so stop glorifying your emotions to make people interested in you.
You can never go wrong with keeping two shades of lipstick in your purse at all times. Feeling bad about yourself? Going somewhere unexpected and you’re feeling underdressed? I guarantee you that lipstick will change your whole perspective of yourself and you will come off as much more confident.
Take care of yourself first. Your job, your schoolwork, your relationships can all wait. Your mental health, however, cannot. If you need a mental health day, take it! You are the most important detail of your life- make sure you’re taken care of.
Invest in things that’ll create memories. Buy things like funny card games that you and your friends or family can enjoy for years to come, allowing you to grow closer and share in more laughs. Buy a book that you can reread over and over to feel the magic of the ending a hundred times if you wanted. Save up for fun vacations for you and your friends that you’ll be able to reminisce on for years to come.
If the shoes didn’t fit right in the store, they’re not going to fit right during a long day on your feet at work. This goes with any type of clothing item; make sure you don’t leave the store with bags full of things you’re unsure of because you’ll end up wasting tons of time and money.
If something isn’t working for you, change how you approach it. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over expecting different results. Going back to an old flame that constantly burned you down in the past will always leave you feeling unfulfilled.
Spend more time in coffee shops. Even if you don’t drink coffee, try sitting in an empty corner of a coffee shop for an hour and it’ll leave you feeling more nostalgic than you’ve ever felt. You’ll see people that may be different than you, you’ll smell some of the most pleasant smells, and the warm atmosphere will make you feel more at ease with yourself.
Recognize that not everyone has the same heart as you do, and that’s ok. I’ve spent so much time in my life trying to understand people and why they do some of the things they do. People aren’t bad people just because they don’t seem to care as much as you might about your relationship, but if you’re feeling unappreciated, find people with bigger hearts.
Find a book that’ll change your life. There are plenty out there, you just have to discover them. Spend a rainy afternoon in the fiction section of a Barnes and Noble reading the back covers of books to find stories that will resonate deep in your soul. If you think you’re not a “book person,” you probably just haven’t found the right kind of book.
Understand that there are multiple ways to say ‘I love you’ without using those exact words.
“Text me when you get home,”
“Are you ok?”
“How can I help you?”
“You’re better than that,”
“He doesn’t deserve you.”
Nothing bad has ever come out of a little “you” time. Indulge in yourself. Take a long walk by yourself, take a hot bath, do your favorite craft, bake your favorite cookies, take a well-needed nap.
Realize that there’s a huge difference between missing someone and wanting them back into your life. You can miss someone with every fiber of your being, but that doesn’t mean they deserve a place in your life after hurting you so many times before. It’s ok to miss someone that you no longer want around, and it’s ok to love someone you no longer like.
Being yourself is the best thing you can be, ever. No one can be you better, and if you aren’t you, who will be? Hiding behind some fake facade has never helped anyone- branch out and become the person you’ve always wanted to be.
Take risks. Nothing extraordinary has ever come from being mediocre. Do something you see crazy; put your faith into something bigger than yourself. After all, what do you have to lose?
Don’t like your body? Do something about it. Eat better and exercise. It sucks now, but you’ll thank yourself later. Put all of the energy into working out that you would otherwise put into complaining about not liking your appearance. You’ll be amazed at what your body can do if you give it the chance to.
Embark on an exploration of self-discovery. Realize that you’re still young and there’s plenty of time to find your soulmate, but finding yourself is key. Understanding everything you want and love in life will get you much further than finding a companion who doesn’t know you because you don’t even know yourself.
Be patient. Whether you’re in a waiting room waiting for your appointment that passed half an hour ago, waiting on a friend to meet you at the restaurant you planned to meet at 15 minutes ago, or waiting on acceptance letter to the college, internship, or graduate program you’re so desperately wishing to get into, worrying and getting aggravated won’t make things happen any faster. Sit and relax.
Most importantly, realize that there’s always room for improvements, and they don’t happen overnight. With the beginning of a new year, we try and make all of these unrealistic resolutions that last a few weeks at most. Pick a few main things you want to change about yourself and work hard to do just that. You’ll make just as many mistakes this year as you did last year, and that’s ok.