You know that you’re only making like a dollar an hour, but haters gonna hate, you’ve got the best job in the world. People on the outside just don’t understand what it means to spend your summer in the camp wild. They don’t understand that you can in fact survive on Oreos and Gatorade and that severe tan lines and bad haircuts can be sort of cool. And they’ll never experience the absolute pride of losing your voice after defeating every child in your cabin in a yelling competition, nor will they rock tie-dye like you do. People on the outside just don’t get it. But it’s okay. Because you get it, and really, that’s all that matters.
1. If handled incorrectly, “Boom Chicka Boom” will never end.
2. Side hugs. You know all about side hugs.
3. Sleeping is more important than showering.
4. There’s always one counselor who is actually an extra camper.
5. Never trust parents when they say they didn’t pack any sweets.
6. Tan lines can get competitive.
7. There’s always that one kid who just really doesn’t like you.
8. And there are always those kids who like you way too much.
9. The world would operate better if everybody could just do some team-building exercises.
10. Spaghetti night is the wildest of nights.
11. Punishing the counselor is a camp game for the ages.
12. Like really, there’s nothing kids enjoy more than punishing their counselors.
13. Trends are easy to start.
14. There are few things a kid likes more than a man dressed up like a lady.
15. “Ding” = “That’s what she said.”
17. The cup game is harder than it looks.
18. These are a great way to keep kids busy forever.
19. It’s more difficult than you think to get kids to make a circle.
20. Fellow counselors get more attractive as the summer goes on. Only to get less attractive in retrospect.
21. When you’re not sure what to wear — tie-dye.
22. Sometimes you have to get creative with the end of week awards.
23. It is very important for everyone in your life to know that you are a camp counselor.
24. When you’re engaged, kids will be as well.
25. People don’t understand when you turn down a “real job” to go to camp.
26. Camp is a real job.
27. And you wouldn’t trade those memories for the world.
View all articles by Primetime Legend