College students tend to have sex in college. Some before, some after. However, what is the normal age that someone loses their virginity? More importantly, how do people first feel after they lost their virginity? Are they excited? Here’s a twist. What if they are regretful and mad that they lose their virginity to the wrong person? Either way, here are some interesting responses from people who talk about their experience losing their virginity. Enjoy!
1. Coming to the end of my 23 year, I finally lost my virginity. It was not a moment for the storybooks – I was drunk, high (also for the first time), and we were both too wasted to suggest protection (note: This was a couple of weeks ago, and I am not pregnant, nor do I have any STIs.) I lost it to a man I work with. I had a crush on him, but knew that he would make a terrible boyfriend. I still wanted to sleep with him, so I gave him my number. We had a date, he took me back to his place, we had otherwise unmemorable, drugged sex, and now I only see him at work. I will admit to some unwanted brooding on my part (“he doesn’t waaaant me!”), but I didn’t expect anything from him after it was over. So, in conclusion, I had only minor feelings and no relationship with my first sexual partner. Now that I don’t feel worried about being an eternal virgin, I guess I’ll have to work on making the next time better.
2. To my second high school boyfriend. Wish I had done it with my first high school boyfriend – he was much sweeter and we are still friends. The other guy, not so much. We both thought we would be together forever. It didn’t happen. I hear he was bitter about it for a long time, but assume now that he is married and a father he sees that it was for the best. I am not bitter, although I have no desire to be friends. He was not a nice person towards the end when I had to dump him.
3. It was a few months ago, with a guy from my school who I had a terrible crush on for the whole semester. He was very, very attractive to me in many ways, and very sweet. We became friends right away, but I didn’t admit that I liked him for a good month. After that, there was definitely a mutual attraction thing going, complete with lustful stares across the room. He told me he didn’t want a relationship for various reasons, but asked me if I wanted to have sex anyways. I was hesitant, but ended up going for it because 1) I wanted to see what the damn big deal was, and 2) I wanted it to be with someone that I trusted and liked. It’s hard to explain now, but there was something about him that sort of drew me out and made me want to trust him completely in a way I never felt before. We still sorta-kind of keep in touch (through Facebook), but mostly all those intense feelings have faded. It was enjoyable while it lasted, though. We were both 20 at the time (he’s since turned 21).
4. We were a couple for about six months before it happened so it roughly marked the halfway point in our relationship. Various teenage dramas ensued and there was fluctuating hostility for a couple of years afterwards but eventually that settled down. We’re friendly acquaintances now and chat if we bump into each other, and his wife is one of my Facebook contacts. We brought out the worst in each other and staying together would have been a horrible mistake, but he is a good person and I don’t regret that it was him.
5. She was someone who I had sort of just met. Except not really. My mother and hers were best friends from high school, but they lived on separate continents since the girl I lost it to was born. I had previously met her when she was, I don’t know, 4 or 5? and I was not quite a teenager. I saw her again when I traveled Europe; I was 21 and she was 14 or so. I went back recently, at age 29, and I ended up spending a lot of time with her while visiting her family because she was on holiday from college and the rest of her family were had work or school. We had a pretty intense connection from the moment we laid eyes on each other. Some of it was sexual, but it was probably more emotional than anything else. We had sex on the night before she was about to leave for Paris and a day before I was about to leave on my way back to Milan to fly home (though I had about a week left until my flight; I was planning on seeing a few friends and getting there a few days ahead of time to be safe). That night I missed the train back to her parents place and she suggested that I stay the night with her. She made it clear that she was interested in some sort of sexual activity if I was. We both knew and even made more or less explicit that this was a one-night-stand situation–indeed at first she said she thought it would be better if we didn’t have intercourse (and no kissing on the mouth). I had no problem with this. During the course of the night she changed her mind about intercourse and so we had sex. I haven’t kept in close contact with her since, but we exchange emails every so often. I still think fondly of her and will always be happy to hear from her, and really I imagine I’ll always feel a connection to her, but we each have our own lives to live. She said, before we went back to her place, that she thought we were lovers in a previous life. Though I don’t really think in those terms, it actually described how I felt pretty well.
6. I was seventeen, he was eighteen. His cousin dated my best friend for a year or so. Sometimes, Cousin would bring Jerry along and best friend would bring me along, then they’d go off and leave us to entertain each other. This didn’t happen too often, as we all lived in different cities (met during summer vacation). Jerry wasn’t all that interested in me, but he was a good sport. I loved him with all my heart and soul. We’d mess around. One day, he called up to say he’d be leaving the next day for Air Force boot camp and did I want to hang out for a while? I knew I’d never see him again, and that The Big Day had come at last. If I put together all the moments we’d spent together since we’d met, it might have been…two days?
7. I considered my virginities (I count myself as having had two) as burdens needing to be disposed of so that I could get on with not being a virgin anymore. The boy (one of only two ever) – We’d met online, had a bit of a distance thing going for a few months, and then we decided he should fly in from Minnesota to California for a weekend. I was 21, he was 19. I was taller than him, and he was a very nice guy. It was not really memorable aside from the whole being the first time and he was quite endowed. When he flew back home, things pretty much immediately fizzled, and I think he met a nice girl closer to home shortly thereafter. I was quite relieved when he told me about her. The girl (one of….no comment) – She picked me up at the first lesbian bar I’d ever set foot in, on the first night I walked in the door. I gave her my number. She called me at 4am that night, which sent up a big red flag but didn’t stop me from unburdening myself of my ledbianhead a few nights later in the twin bed she was sleeping in at her friend’s (rather awful) house because she’d recently been kicked out by her Mom for being gay. I was beyond thrilled to find the experience of sex with a woman that I was only kinda attracted to, in an environment that was less than ideal (I remember that there were roaches in the bathroom, and the whole house was a complete mess) was great. More than I was hoping for. We went out for breakfast and that was the last time I saw her. She called me again and tried to get me to go out with her on her birthday later that week, but thankfully I had to work. I felt sorry for her that she didn’t seem to have any other plans, but really didn’t want to encourage any unrequited feelings. I was then free of my self-perceived burden(s) and stepped confidently into my authentic sexual self, being (usually) much more selective about the women I would sleep with going forward.
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