Awkward Hookups Written By: Mackenzie Newcomb
1.) I had a ridiculous crush on a guy who lived down the hall from me freshman year. I went to school in the south, but being from the north I thought him being a Jersey boy was hot. Anyway, the last few weeks of school we finally get drunk enough to spend the night together at his place and when I wouldn’t have sex with him because he didn’t have a condom he said, “What Anna? You don’t wanna have babies with me?!” I obviously didn’t want to have his kids. He laughed and said that I didn’t share the same humor as him, but I didn’t think making jokes about having children together ass naked was that funny. I can’t decide if that was better or worse than the time a guy rolled over first thing in the morning after sleeping (yes only sleeping) over and whispering in my ear “Did you know I’m a vampire?”.
2.) My high school boyfriend and I were hooking up in my friends guest room at a party a week or so after graduation. About two minutes in (with him on top) he attempted to lift me up to change positions and ended up banging my head SO HARD on the headboard. I screamed and he finished. And all of our friends heard it.
3.) During junior year of high school I had a class with the “new kid from Florida”. He was extremely good looking, and we started talking a little bit here and there. He invited me over to his on a snow day. His brother was home and we were all hanging out and he brought me into another room in his house. I wasn’t really paying attention to the surroundings or decor of the room until after we were done hooking up I noticed we were in his mothers room, on his mothers bed….. I was mortified!
4.) So in all honesty, i’ve made out with my fair share of guys. and i’m pretty sure that i have eaten a booger from 3 different guys. not at once obviously.. buttttttt still. *vom*