17 Thoughts of the Party Wallflower (3)

9. “That projectile vomiting was so bad, it was almost impressive.”

8. “I’m really, really not drunk enough for this.”

7. “Last time I checked Facebook, that person was definitely not supposed to be kissing that person, but here we are.”

6. “If I suffocate to death under the weight of this body heat and twerk sweat, someone take good care of my dog.”


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