Boxed Wine: Nothing says “get dressed up to get messed up” like slapping a bag of Sunset Blush Franzia. The expectations of a classy wine night with cheese and crackers is far from the reality of drinking liquid-candy tasting wine, that looks like it’s in a giant IV bag. This drink is perfect for any Fratalina Wine Mixer, because you can buy five liters of it for the low price of $13.99. Quantity over quality right? Halfway through the box though, you forget you’re trying to be classy and will wind up heels off, laying on the couch of a fraternity house eating a bag of Cheetos.
Tequila Shots: These deadly shots are acceptable only on two occasions: your birthday or Cinco De Mayo. The popular saying “One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor” speaks the truth. If you’re celebrating your birthday at a Mexican restaurant, you can already expect a mariachi band to come out with a sombrero to put on your head and a bottle of Jose Cuervo to pour down your throat. This at first is all good, until you wind up on top of the bar, singing La Bamba with your heels off and your sombrero still on.
All in all, as long as you make it back to your room safe and you ended up with a long snapchat story, then your night was probably okay.
