5.) Marcus Fenix
Honestly, me and Marcus have never been good friends. It isn’t that he is a bad guy or anything, I just get so sick of listening to the same war stories over and over again. But when he told me he got a new electric turkey carver that I just had to see, I really couldn’t pass it up. The one thing he forgot to mention, however, is that his idea of an electric turkey carver is a machine gun with a chainsaw on the end of it. Right around the time my family bowed their heads to say grace, Marcus kicked my front door in, did a barrel roll into the kitchen, body slammed the turkey, and began carving wildly into the bird, throwing meat all over the faces of me and my family. He then finished by throwing a smoke grenade at my grandmother and vanishing.
4.) Qbert
My Thanksgiving with Qbert was bizarre to say the least. I invited him (her maybe?) into the kitchen to check out the food, and every time the little thing would jump onto a new tile, it changed color! I shouted at him to stop and exit the kitchen, but I was only met with “@!#?!*!” I have no idea what that meant, so I just tried to grab the guy, but it was too late. Before everything was said and done the tiles on my kitchen floor were three different colors and followed no pattern whatsoever.
3.) Vault Dweller
I didn’t know the guy’s name or anything, but he looked like he had eaten nothing but roach meat for weeks so I couldn’t turn him away. He was a nice enough guest, although he did have one quirk. After dinner was done I caught him sneaking around the kitchen stealing everyones bottle caps…I guess I will never know why.
2.) Snake
Me and Snake are old war buddies so I couldn’t resist the chance to invite the guy over for some turkey on Thanksgiving. I began to get worried after about an hour or so of him not being there. Another thirty minutes passed before someone pointed out the mashed potatoes were missing. I thought nothing of it at first, but after another ten minutes had passed, the sweet potatoes had vanished as well! I was starting to get a little paranoid, “is my house haunted?” I wondered. I remembered that Snake was kind of a prankster back in the day, so I decided to give him a call to see if he had anything to do what was going on. Shortly after clicking “call,” I hear a cellphone ringing under an overturned box in my kitchen. I glanced at the box for only a moment before it began to scurry away! Me and a few family members managed to catch it after a few minutes, so I turned the box over to see what in the world was going on. It was Snake stuffing mashed potatoes into his face! He had been with us the whole time!
1.) Angry Birds
Okay, so they weren’t guests so much as a meal, but the angry birds were delicious! By far my favorite video game character to have at Thanksgiving.
Happy Thanksgiving!!
