1. Telling people off
When you’ve made it passed 65, you’ve suddenly become wise, so you can say whatever the hell you want. I know it’s something you’ve always wanted to do, but instead you’ve decided to hold up societal constructs.
One time they wouldn’t give my grandmother the senior discount (see #5) at the movie theatre. She let that poor soul behind the counter know how she really felt. I think he had to check into psychiatric care after the incident.
2. Diners
I know you love diners. How could you not? They have literally everything on the menu (and it’s good,) you get to people watch some weirdos, and it’s all from the comfort of a nice, homey booth.
3. Lots of sleep
You probably wish that you could sleep more. You can! Just make it into your 70s and you can sleep more often than this duck.
Dreams really do come true!
4. Jeopardy!/Wheel of Fortune every night
As much as you hate to admit it, you sorta like watching these Merv Griffin classics. If you don’t feel good when you get Final Jeopardy right then you’re not fond of joy or happiness.
It is up for debate which should be watched first, but I think it’s safe to say that Wheel of Fortune is the cool down game.
5. The senior discount
Imagine a world where things are cheaper. That world can be your reality…if you are just really, really patient.
Discount Double Check, baby!
6. Collecting Social Security
FREE MONEY!
7. Taking as many mints as you want when you leave a restaurant
I once saw my grandmother open her purse and spill about 50 mints into it, yet it was socially acceptable. Imagine what a hot commodity you’ll be with such fresh breath.
8. Vacation
You’ve saved up your money. You’ve got free time. Go see this place.
Or this place.
Or this place.
9. Spoiling Your grandkids
The joy or raising children without actually raising children: the lucky role of the grandparent. You are like the parent that can do no wrong. You’ll finally be loved!
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All the sleazy no class women do that. I know…
seriously guys… I’m at #23 UofA and this is a…
Quality blog post, you really hit some points…
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